Overdue Update

The boys are keeping us really busy these days. Their day runs from 8a-8p with a one or two hour nap after lunch. Most days with the boys are a lot of fun, but it isn't always gum drops and lollipops, as you can imagine.

Every day Cedric and Ezra are learning something new. Sometimes good things... sometimes bad things. We have made momentous progress on manners recently. Their skills of reason have also started to develop. They now understand what we want, however it is still a toss up if they decide to comply or not.

They are learning new words daily and will repeat anything you say. Anything. It has been a lot of fun watching them grow. They have such different personalities it is hard to believe they are twins.

Ezra is a runner. I can already anticipate phone calls from his teachers saying he ran away. He gets this look on his face and you can see he is testing how you will respond.

We have had a few problems with our ayah. I came home the other day and she was letting the kids dance on the coffee table. We have been working hard on keeping them from climbing on it... now we know why they were not listening. It is also culturally difficult for our ayah tell the twins "no". It is a different way of looking at it but it's as if the she works for the kids. So we are working on boundary issues where she has to tell the boys no and enforce the rules while we are gone.

We have also had our fair share of illness. Everyone has had coughs, running noses, and fevers. Cedric has had a few terrible reactions to bug bites. Some that have led to skin infections with very disgusting looking boils on his legs. I could never be a doctor. I had to stop trying to diagnose the issue using Dr. Google after seeing the search results for skin rashes. People are nasty!

We are still trying to get Ezra to pack on the pounds. Cedric is gaining weight like normal, but Ezra just can't seem to gain a pound. He is a good eater, but must burn calories at a much higher rate. He never stops moving so maybe he will always be a skinny mini.

Eating out with twins is going quite well. Once in awhile we have to end dinner a bit quickly, but most of the time they are perfect gentleman. We have noticed they seem to eat better when we all eat together as opposed to having a kids meal time and then an adult meal time.

The weather is still quite hot in Delhi. We have been swimming most weekends and sometimes swim during the week. Ezra is a little fish and will jump from the side of the pool and blow bubbles and all sorts of fun stuff in the water. Cedric also loves the water, but he has always been a little more reserved and leaves the show boating the his brother.

We have also joined a very diverse play group. There are kids from Norway, Germany, Brazil, Spain, India, and Czech Republic. Our ayah has been coordinating with several other ayahs to have regular play groups at a different house three times a week. Once a week we host at our house and there are nine children and nine ayahs all in our house. I stuck my head in the door once. It was toddler overload.

Cedric and Ezra are really good at sharing with other children. However sharing between themselves is another story. I find it very interesting how they interact with each other. Ezra will take things from Cedric just for fun and then run through the house as if it is a game. Cedric subsequently is chasing him through the house screaming for his toy back. We have a lot of work to do in this area. Maybe a life long task.

I am heading to Las Vegas for a work conference in two weeks. I am looking forward to learning something new and excited for the networking possibilities. It has been a few years since I have been in Las Vegas. I can't wait to see if I can still win at black jack. My mom and dad are also going to meet me there for a couple of days.

Sorry this post turned into a novel. I guess that's what happens when you are terrible bloggers and forget to post anything for two months!

Chad

Goodbye Pacifier

We did it. It was easy. We should have done it sooner.

We knew that Cedric was addicted to his pacifier. While we were on vacation we noticed that he had become extremely addicted to his pacifier. It seemed that every time he would get upset the only solution was to hand him a pacifier. We noticed that he was unable to self soothe, and it was effecting everyone. It became quite the task for us to make sure all pacifiers were accounted for, which ones had been in the ocean, which ones had sand on them, and where they were in the middle of the night when he decided to throw one out of the crib and scream for a new one.

There in Koh Chang we declared that once we settled back in Delhi the days of the pacifier were through.

It took two days to build up the courage to follow through. We kept coming up with excuses like "he needs to settle in for a day" and "we want to be able to spend the day with him if he has problems" and "we don't want the first day without the pacifier to be with our nanny". All excuses to delay the inevitable.

Last Sunday Cedric woke up and his pacifier was gone. We gathered every pacifier in the house and put them in the safe... just in case we didn't have the strength.

We knew the big test would be the first nap. We put him down to sleep minus his pacifier, and he screamed bloody murder for thirty minutes. We held our ground... and apologized to Ezra and our neighbors for the noise, but we didn't give in. He went to sleep. The afternoon eating and playing went fine. When the afternoon nap rolled around we knew what to expect, but he only cried for ten minutes. The last test of the day would be going to bed for the night. He cried for thirty minutes again, but still slept through the night just fine.

Monday came and went as though nothing happened. He now goes right to sleep when we put him down.

That was it... one day, and now we are enjoying a pacifier free life!

Chad

Playing Catch Up: Turkey Trip

Hello blog readers! I'm not sorry for the long pause in blogging. Life is as busy as hell and the blog gets put on the back burner.

Turkey was a great trip despite me declaring a moratorium on all future travel on the flight to Istanbul. It all started around 2a. We packed the boys up and headed to the airport where they slept through check-in, immigration, security, and boarding. We took our seats and life as we knew it changed. The boys kicked it into high gear, and since it was morning time it was play time. Under normal circumstances this would be fine, but Douglas and I had been up since 2a and were approaching exhaustion. Just an FYI holding two almost one year olds still for six hours on three hours of sleep isn't pretty. So we learned that timing is everything, and in the future we will be taking overnight flights when we travel.

Although it started out a bit rough our trip to Istanbul was great. My mother flew in from Indianapolis the day after we arrived, and we had a great time eating street food and touring the city. The streets are clean, the people were nice, and the buildings are beautiful. Istanbul is now on my list of top cities.

Here are some pictures from our trip.

Chad

Up and Out: Turkey

We did not forget about the blog. The twins are definitely keeping us busy around the house. We have both been working hard and traveling hard so our house has been in constant motion.

The boys are on a fairly decent schedule now. We were spoiled way to early with sleeping through the night. We have been dealing with middle of the night feedings since the last post. We think in that beginning the boys were going through a growth spurt and were in fact hungry, but now we have determined they have developed a dependence to the middle of the night bottle. Last night the boys self soothed and everyone woke up happy.

They both love to sing and dance. Anytime we put on the music (except Mary's music) they start to boogie. Bath time at our house is so much fun. They both love to splash. They eat mostly cut up things now, and we only still puree a few things. Ezra only likes spicy chicken. If it doesn't have enough flavor he will spit it out. Cedric still eats everything. Jyoti loves the boys and sits waiting for them to drop food from their high-chairs.

We leave for Istanbul tonight, and have not even taken the suitcases out of the closet. Douglas has decided that we are last minute packers and that stresses me out. If I were in charge of the bags I probably would have done it last week. That being said he always does a great job, and we have never left anything or anyone behind.

Cedric and Ezra will be one year old next week. My mother is meeting us in Istanbul and we are bringing her back to India for two weeks. We are shocked that a whole year has gone by already. The days are busy and a little bit crazy, but I can't imagine it any different.

Chad

It's Back...

Last night we heard screams from the nursery. After several months of sleeping through the night the boys wanted to eat at 2am.

Lets hope this was a one and done thing. Crossing our fingers for tonight!

Chad

Our Life

I am not complaining... BUT!

We never sit down. We have two full time in house nannies/cleaners/cooks and a part time guy that walks our beautiful labrador for an hour each day. We still never sit down. Until I wrote it all down... I never realized what made the world go around.

Here was yesterday play by play:

5:00a: Ezra wakes Cedric up to help convince Dadda and Papa it is time to eat
5:15a: Twins toss bottles to the side, roll over, and pass out
5:20a: Douglas rejoins my lazy ass in bed
6:30a: Douglas makes his paleo breakfast
7:00a: I make my paleo-ish breakfast, twins on full court press, Douglas in shower
7:30a: Sheela arrives, I get in the shower
7:45a: Pouring coffee: Douglas black, mine with 1/4 cup creme, 3 heaping spoons of sugar
7:55a: Out the door, umbrella up
8:00a: Work
5:00p: I get home and finish up some work emails, twins sleeping
5:05p: Douglas out the door for disc
5:35p: I grab a snack, grab the remote, plant left ass cheek on the couch
5:36p: Cedric wakes up
5:40p: Ezra wakes up
5:41p: Twins full court press
5:50p: Strap the boys into stroller, bug spray, mosquito nets, dog on leash
6:00p: Pick Douglas up from disc, head off campus for 50 min walk
7:00p: Twins in high-chairs for dinner
7:30p: Twins in bath tub, Douglas making adult dinner
7:50p: Wheels fall off, screaming, wet, tired
8:00p: Twins dry, dressed, tiny bottle, sleep
8:05p: Adult dinner, vodka on the rocks
8:20p: Dishes
8:30p: Make baby food
9:45p: Pushups/Sit-ups for Thailand beach body, Big Bang Theory on in background
10:15p: Wake twins up for another small bottle (this put the stop on the 3a nursery rave)
10:30p: Adult bed time

Chad

Oh Sleep, Why Dost Thou Leave Me?

We've been back in India for a month now and the kids are well adjusted to being here. They are eating well and playing like little bandicoots. But, alas, Ezra has stopped sleeping through the night. I believe this is due to a growth spurt, to a fourth tooth he just sprouted and to the fact that his little body rarely, if ever, stops wiggling, crawling, speed crawling, standing, pulling, jumping and wiggling again. He's a little ball of energy all day long. If you've experienced this and have any sage words for us to get our little man to go back to sleeping through the night, please let me know in the comments below. 

In the meanwhile, enjoy this aptly named aria from Handel's opera Semele sung by the immortal Kathleen Battle. 

The Witching Hour

Time to check in from Delhi. It is 4:30am and the boys are finally down again. Unbeknownst to me they have been having a party since about mid-night. Douglas finally threw in the towel at 3:00a for some assistance by my PTFO position in bed. With that said I feel great and just had a big breakfast. With this schedule lunch shall commence around 9:30a.

Our trip back couldn't have been more uneventful. We had our typical delay out of Indianapolis, but we  had plenty of time to make the connection so everything worked out. We missed out on our business/first class upgrade. We were number five and six on the list, but they only had four seats available. There will always be a next time.

The boys did great the entire time. Cedric slept in two hour intervals which allowed me to get some good naps in.  He is a comfort eater, and a pacifier addict so it was easy to keep him happy. He was quite the social butterfly with the man sitting next to us. I actually had to tell the man to ignore him so he would go to sleep. Ezra slept for the first ten hours of the flight, and then woke up ready to run a marathon. Douglas had his work cut out for him the last few hours of the flight. I can count on one hand how many minutes the boys cried in the 24 hours it took to get from Indy to India. We are so thankful that our boys are such great travelers.

The final tally of things making the journey: eight checked bags (50-60 lbs each), five carry-on bags (includes two diaper bags and two baby carriers, and a rolling suitcase with relief everything), two babies, two adults, and four bottles from duty free. Our driver that met us at the airport had a look of terror on his face when he saw us heading in his direction. Everything fit... including the twins and the top shelf vodka.

The twins are changing so fast. They are both mobile so it is game on. We quickly learned that our house is not yet child proofed. I love getting Cedric to laugh. He is majorly ticklish and his laugh is contagious. Erza might be a gymnast in a few years. He can contort and bend in ways I can't imagine.

Some of our friends are already here, and the rest will trickle in over the next few days. We met the new faculty and they are a great bunch of people. As anticipated the newbies are shocked when we tell them this is year five for us.

It feels great to be back in Delhi.

Chad

What's A Day With Twins Like, v. 2.0

For some time now, our top blog post has been the first installment of "What's a Day with Twins Like." Probably, all of those expectant parents out there are furiously researching what life will be like once their multiple bundles of joy arrive. When I Google search that sentence, our blog is the second link on the page. Maybe that's why we're so popular!

So, I've decided to update now that our twins are a bit older and can do more stuff. Like I've said in previous posts, we're lucky to have a full time, in-home nanny who takes care of the kids while we're at work, so I'm going to write about a day when she's not here, and it's just two-on-two.

Cedric and Ezra wake up at about 6:00 AM. Really, they're little alarm clocks masquerading as infants; you could set a watch to them. Since I'm more of a morning person, I get up with them and we do a diaper change/feeding straight away while Chad attempts to sleep through any of our morning noise. After eating, the twins go in their bouncy seats and chew on whatever their favorite toy-du-jour is while I get some breakfast, water the plants on the balcony and throw in a load of laundry. After that, I usually, put them in their cribs for some twin time. They pass toys back and forth and chew on anything else they can get their hands on. We do diaper changes and read a book or two, do some baby stretches and sing for a while. By that time, Chad is usually up and the twins are ready for nap number one, which starts at about 8:00 and goes until 9:30ish.

At 9:30, we repeat the diaper changes and usually have an outfit change from all the slobber from the chewing. Then, by 10:00 we're ready for bottle number two. We each feed one baby, and when we're done we go on a walk around our apartment area, or we'll walk to the grocery store if we're doing any baking. We're usually in by 11:00 and the boys are ready to sit on the balcony and listen to the birds, or watch while someone folds clothes and starts more laundry.

After a short nap that hopefully starts around 12:30, and goes until past 1:00, they eat again any time between 1:30 and 2:00. This is the fussy time of the day, so we really try to have an activity planned, or have someplace to go or something to see. Lately, we've enjoyed the pool on weekends because it's so hot in the afternoon. Sometimes we'll split up and one twin will go with one dad, and the other with the other dad. Usually both boys are ready for their last nap by 4:30, and they sleep until 5:30.

Then, it's wake up time for the last bottle before bed at 6:00 PM. Right after that bottle, we take Jyoti on a walk in the neighborhood, and get back to the house around 7:00 in time for a diaper change, some naked time to let their skin breath and then some reading time or bath time (every 3rd night) before we put on pajamas and head to bead between 7:30-8:00. Chad throws in some laundry, while I make dinner. We eat at around 8:00 PM, and enjoy having an adult meal together.

I usually head to bed at about 9:30 so I can be fresh for the morning shift, and Chad stuffs diapers and relaxes until the boys have a nighttime bottle at 10:00 PM. They're back in bed with double-stuffed g-diapers by 10:30 and Chad comes to bed. They boys sleep soundly until 4:30 AM, when I usually have to get up and put a pacifier in Cedric's mouth. He goes right back to sleep, though, and they both wake up with big smiles at 6:00.

Here are some things that keep us sane:
1. Splitting the workload: no one parent should have to do all of the domestic duties. Chad is a pro at stuffing diapers; whereas, I take care of making the solution for their baby wipes.

2. The day is organized around the feedings: There are 4 hours in between feedings when we have some activity time, and then a nap.

3. Clean as you go: Cedric and Ezra both love just watching me clean the kitchen, prepare food, or fold laundry. They usually don't even need a toy, they just love to be observant. So, rather than letting the chores pile up, I can get things done while they sit and watch or play.

4. The twins eat at the same time: This is essential. When one is hungry, we also feed the other. We'd have gone insane long ago if they were on two different eating schedules.

I hope this is helpful to anyone trying to figure out what their routine will be like with twins. I highly recommend the book Secrets of the Baby Whisperer, which talks about a structured routine with infants.

Cheers,
Douglas   

The Breeze at Dawn

Not that our children have ever been finicky sleepers; indeed, ever since the day we brought them home, we've had to wake them for their night feedings, and then they go immediately back to sleep. Well, since both boys are gaining weight so well, we thought we'd try skipping the middle-of-the-night-drag-your-bum-out-of-bed feeding. And guess what...

The boys slept from 11:00 PM until 6:00 AM, and we're happy as clams when they woke up.

I, on the other hand, woke up at 4:30 AM (on a saturday nonetheless) wondering how long the babies would stay asleep, and excited they had made it that long. Maybe my mind will let my body sleep tomorrow night!

Meanwhile, here's a poem in honor of the boy's epic night of sleep, and my lack thereof:

The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.

Don't go back to sleep.

You must ask for what you really want.

Don't go back to sleep.

People are going back and forth across the doorsill

where the two worlds touch.

The door is round and open.

Don't go back to sleep.

- Rumi (from The Essential Rumi, tr. Coleman Barks)

Eat, Poop, Sleep

Most of you probably do not know that I was in a movie with Julia Roberts.

Alright, that might be overstating my role a bit. But, it is true. When the cast and crew of Eat, Pray, Love was in India filming for the Indian portion of the book, some of the teachers at my school were recruited to join in as extras for the crowd scenes. So, during the Connecticut wedding scene in the movie (which was, oddly enough, filmed in Delhi), you can see me for a few brief seconds.

Tomorrow, Cedric and Ezra will be three weeks old and life has been as great as a movie. Although, it is a movie of a different title all together.  Do you see where this is going? So, without writing a novel, I will give you a bit of a description about the three most important things in our boys lives right now. Eat, poop and sleep!

Eat: The biggest thing in our lives right now is bottle feeding. With late-term preemies (ours were born at 36w3d), being on a feeding schedule is mandatory. When they first came home from the hospital, Ezra was on a two-hour feeding cycle, which did NOT work for him at all. He was so tired after his 30 minute feeds that he would not be able to eat for the next feed and his intake kept getting lower and lower. So, we changed him over to a three hour cycle and he started consuming more formula at every bottle. Cedric is our little alarm clock. He usually wakes up hungry within 10 minutes (before, or after if we're running a bit late) of the three hour mark. He is quite prodigious at letting the world know when he is hungry.

Poop: As soon as our boys got home from the hospital, we switched to cloth diapers. Our reasons for doing this are economical, medical and environmental. Economically, diapers are quite expensive here in India, and diapers for small babies (4-8 lbs) are not available. So, when were in the US in the summer, we stocked up on G-Diapers, which is an initial investment of about $250. But, they will probably paid for themselves by the time our boys are 8 weeks old. The environmental impact of using diapers is huge, and especially in India, where proper waste disposal doesn't happen, we wanted to live our beliefs about the environment. Using cloth diapers has been a lot of fun (yep, I said fun), and it has worked REALLY well for our boys. We also have been using this recipe to make our own wipes with the hypo-allergenic baby soap we use for bath time. You won't be finding any trace of diaper rash on our C or E's little bums!

Sleep: Being on a three-hour feeding cycle really dictates the sleeping schedule. Our boys eat at 3-6-9-12 AM/PM.  During the daytime hours, we change nappies and enjoy finding things to stare at and do stretches and try to stay awake for as long as possible after feedings during the day. Then, the boys fall asleep until the next feeding. At night, both boys are bout 85% at eating and then going right back to sleep. Having this kind of schedule has been such a major help to us as parents. We know when we're going to need to get up in the night and we can make a plan (Douglas at 12 AM and 6 AM, Chad at 3 AM, or vice-versa). The schedule has made our babies very happy, and has made me be able to go back to work this week and not feel like a walking zombie!

Beyond all the eating, pooping and sleeping, there is a whole lot of love going on at our house. We love cuddling and playing with the boys (as much as they can "play"). Also, our friends and colleagues have surrounded us with a big blanket of love and we feel so supported as new parents. We are so thankful for these last 20 days.

Much love to everyone!
Douglas 

And on the Seventh Day...

Things I've noticed since the arrival of Ezra and Cedric, some of them more profound than others:

Life is beautiful. Not that it wasn't ever beautiful, but these two lives that are now a part of us are already opening our eyes to the wonders of the world. This week has been nothing short of amazing.

G-diapers are great. I love that we are diapering our kids in a way that supports what we believe about the environment. From the moment our kids got home from the hospital this week, they have been in cloth diapers. Even the nasty post-birth meconium mess was contained by the g-diapers. Wow!

We have the sweetest labrador ever! She has been ignored, been stepped on, and had her space invaded by two crying infants, two busy daddys and lots of well-wishers, and she is still the sweetest dog ever.

I love the community we live in. We've had so many people stop by this week to meet the babies and wish us well. They have cooked for us, helped us with diapers, brought us stories of the outside world, and just been there for us to talk to. Thank you to our friends. I'm so glad that we get to start our parenting journey in this community.

Organization is essential. Chad, my wonderful husband, was remarkably organized this week and got us through checkout of the hospital with both twins and for our surrogate, collecting the birth certificates and the initial paperwork and DNA test at the consulate. He was superb throughout the whole week! Every document that needed to be handed in was filed, color-coded, and ready to go.

Organization is essential. This one is worth repeating. We spent most of the third trimester of our pregnancy getting the nursery ready for the babies, and I'm so glad we did. Now, I am really appreciating how detail oriented we were. Every little thing, down to the organization of clothes by size and the pre-stuffing of the diaper inserts has been appreciated.

Having twins means you have two children who are different. Actually, I knew that already. But, I never expected for a minute that my two children would be SO different even from the minute they were born. Having Ezra in the hospital for 3 days more than Cedric was difficult, to say the least. It reminded me again, that they are two different people, and from the outset will have different needs.

Sleep is great. I'm not going to pretend that we're all zombied out and sleep deprived. Have we slept less in the last week than in a good while?  Oh yes! Are we walking around carrying pictures of our bed? No (at least not yet...). What I will say, however, is that waking up when you're sleep deprived is like trying to get out of quicksand. The first two minutes of awake time are the hardest.

And finally, and most importantly, I love my boys and my husband more than I could ever have imagined possible.

Today is the one-week anniversary of the birth of our twins. Today our family took a moment to rest and relax together. From the two pictures below, you can tell why I feel exceedingly blessed.

New Perspectives

As you can imagine, we are over the moon with our boys. At the same time, however, it is so emotional to have one baby at home and one still in the hospital. Here's an update on all four boys in our family:

Ezra is learning about bottles like a little pro! Last night he had a practice session with a pacifier to get his sucking reflex going. Then, this morning when we came for a feeding, his tube was removed and he drank 15 mL from the bottle. Since then, he's had four bottle feedings of between 15 and 20 mL. Otherwise, he's a great and healthy little guy with the deepest blue eyes, and the cutest little lips. We really want him to come home soon. Cedric misses his womb-mate!

Cedric is increasing his bottle feed quantities every day. He's our little gas pipe, so we make sure to give him a few extra burps with every feed so as to avoid any upset stomachs. He has slept at home for two nights now. The first night was a fussy night. He wasn't sure what to think about a quiet and dark house. He seems to prefer the voices of people and lots of light. He also has deep blue eyes, and the longest piano fingers you've ever seen.

Chad's paternal gene has kicked into high gear. He is already a pro at calming Cedric when he needs to. And (this deserves fanfare and trumpets), has changed his first poopy diaper!

Douglas is getting really good at driving back and forth between BLK hospital and the apartment. He is loving having Cedric at home and can't wait until Ezra is home (although, the nerves are starting to kick about parenting multiples).

Love and Peace to All!
Chad, Douglas, Ezra and Cedric